Love as feeling
I have heard it said over and over again that love is not a feeling, it's an action word! I must say I do not disagree with the idea behind this comment. I understand that the whole point of such a statement is to ensure people that you have to work hard at loving people, such as a significant other. I guess as people get older they may no longer "feel" love towards their significant other, such as the butterflies in the stomach and lightheaded when they are near or at a loss of words when you speak to them. BUT I must say that those "feelings" of love cannot be discredited either. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed with love for Shawn that I don't know what to do with myself. And when those feelings do arise I let them wash over me again and again. I make sure to appreciate such a moment and I soak it in letting it touch the deep parts of me. I am glad to "feel" love for Shawn. Though older people do say that the "feeling" of love will fade, I hope I will always have a feeling of love for Shawn.
I write this because I always thought to ignore feelings of love because people have told me they will fade, but I don't want to ignore them I want to soak them in and revel in my feelings towards my love. And so I will.
I write this because I always thought to ignore feelings of love because people have told me they will fade, but I don't want to ignore them I want to soak them in and revel in my feelings towards my love. And so I will.
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ReplyDeleteKeturah, the feelings of love don't fade with time, I think what people mean when they say you don't always have those feelings are the feelings of butterflies, and the feelings of a new relationship. People think too many times that if that feeling goes, the love is gone, and you can't base your love on the butterfly feelings, those feelings will go up and down through life.
ReplyDeleteI think as you grow old together, your love is so much deeper but in a different way. I don't always have the feelings for dad that I did when we were dating, and neither does he, but our love has changed into a different season of love. I don't quite know how to explain it. When you first are married you enjoy everything for the first time together with excitement and thrill. When you are married for 20, 30 or more years, you have basically seen so much together, and your relationship goes into a different mode, It isn't that people love each other less, it is they love each other different. Treasure these days. That is why there are affairs, because people miss that butterfly effect so to speak. When they have children that begin to date, they see that excitement of the "first of everything" and the enemy tries to make you "think" that you need more in your marriage. As time comes and goes,as some of that fire turns to embers, some of that laughter you have now will turn to tears, and that is when you have to cling to what you have invested through the years, wether the feelings are there or not. You have Christ as the center of your marriage, bask it in, cherish what you have now, make memories, and as you grow older, you will have that to look back on and ignite that "new found" love that you enjoy so much now.
I remember hearing a story of a young girl that was engaged. She was sitting in a restaurant one day and took notice to an old couple sitting across from her. They sat there eating, and didn't say one word through the whole meal. She thought to herself.... "How sad it is to be married that long, and not have anything to say to each other anymore. She sat there thinking that she will not allow that to happen in her marriage. Just then, she noticed that the old man was holding the old womans hand underneath the table. They went to get up to leave, and he helped her up off her chair and gave her cane to her and guided her out of the restaurant to the car. She then said to herself, "Lord, help us to have that kind of love when we are married that long". They were in a different season of love. Anyway, I don't know why I wrote all of this but I hope it ministers to you. I love you much. mom
Thank you Mom! I love you!
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