King Solomon got it right, meaningless.

Recently I have been wrestling with some thoughts. I've been thinking about those who are struggling today; struggling with not having enough food, not enough money, not enough freedom. Those who are close to God's heart; the orphan, the widow. And then I think about my own life and how silly it seems that I am so overwhelmed by getting my degree right now. It seems like night and day I think, breath, feel and live mathematics. I cannot escape it even for one day. I feel like this constant overwhelming feeling is so meaningless when you compare it to the struggles in this world. I feel ashamed with each tear I cry over a test or hw grade. Such meaninglessness. And yet I know this is what God has called me to, He wants me to get this degree, he wants me to become a teacher.

I must say I feel like a child on field day, standing at the starting line of the three legged race waiting for the announcer to say "Ready, Get Set, GO!" That anxious feeling welling up inside, where seconds feel like eternity.

I've been reading Romans 8:28 over and over and over again,

"And we know all things work together for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

I've recently realized that this means that God uses struggles to work for our good too. This has been helping me to endure the "hard" times, knowing that he is working the pride out of my life and getting me prepared for his work.